The MOM Zone

Once upon a time there were believed to be two kinds of mothers. The professional, career-oriented "working mom," and the domestic"stay at home mom."

Both kinds of mother's loved their children and truly believed that their lifestyle and choices were the best way to raise their children in a happy and healthy home. There used to be stigmas and preconceived notions about both kinds of mothers, with the harshest of critics being each other.

The working mom was to be admired for being able to manage it all: running a home, having a job and taking care of her children. But she was also thought of as neglectful by missing her children's milestones and not being present in their daily lives.

By the same token, stay-at-home moms were to be admired for focusing their sole attention on their families and praised for not wanting or needing to work outside the home as a measure of personal fulfillment.

However, they too were scrutinized, not for being neglectful but for being too present in the lives of their children.

After a week of interviews and conversations with mothers on both ends of the working issue it became very clear that even though all of our titles may be different, our number one priority is and always has been our children.

Sharon Miller of West Penn Township has been a home care nurse for 19 years. She loves her job and enjoys helping her patients feel better. She even said that some of her patients "become part of her family."

Her honesty when asked if she enjoys trying to balance between the two was refreshing.

"No," Miller said. "Sometimes I feel like I choose work over my family. However, I do want to show my girls the importance of hard work and dedication."

When asked if she would rather not have her career, her conflict was evident.

"Sometimes I think I would love to be a stay-at-home-mom and maybe have a clean and organized house," she said. "But I really enjoy taking care of my patients and I would miss that."

Miller and her husband work together to manage their children's schedules and entrust family members with their three girls throughout the year.

"Summer is much less stressful, as there aren't any homework projects due or tests to study for or books to read for A/R points," she said.

"It feels like my girls were little, I blinked and now they are almost grown."

Miller's favorite part of the summer is just enjoying spending time shopping, going for lunch or just watching a movie, spending precious time before they are all grown up.

Mother Teresa was quoted as saying, "The miracle is not that we do this work, but that we are happy to do it." And although she never gave birth to children of her own, like all mothers she clearly had an understanding of the meaning of giving, sacrifice and love.

Autumn Abelovsky of Lehighton has been a stay-at-home mom since her two children were born.

"For the first several years after I had children, I did not miss working, but I did miss the adult interaction," she said.

"Having a baby at home meant that I was home 95 percent of the time. But as the kids got older and made friends, I also made new friends."

When asked if the summers were more or less stressful, she said she could lean either way.

"During the school year I can get the house cleaned, but in the summer there is no 'free time' to get the cleaning and errands done. But we always seem to make it work and have plenty of fun time."

Although Abelovsky's children are only 6 and 8 years old, she too treasures every moment of their youth.

"I love seeing all of their interactions with their friends. I don't get to hear all the little conversations in school and our talk at home is mostly of school, sports and extracurricular activities.

"In summer those talks turn into all of the memories that we will make and remember forever."

Although society may have mothers divided into two separate categories, all mothers throughout history seem to have at least one thing in common.

"You will come to know that what appears today to be a great sacrifice, will prove instead to be the greatest investment in love that you will ever make." Author unknown.

And no matter what, all mothers are "working mothers." It's really just a matter of logistics.