Charting her own course: Single mother earns two degrees

Final part in a series

Growing up in the ’60s and ’70s, Eileen Kelly had wanted to be a homemaker — a wife and mother.

Fate had other plans, but because she had been tenacious about getting an education, she was able to steer her own course.

Kelly, who grew up in Philadelphia and now lives in Albrightsville, began taking classes part time at Holy Family College in Philadelphia when she was around 19 or 20. During the day, she worked full time at a bank.

In 1978, when she was 21, Kelly got married. A few years later, she had a son, Christopher, and two years after that, her daughter Megan was born.

But the marriage didn’t last.

Making a decision as to what would be best for her and her children, Kelly took the children and left. They lived with her father-in-law for a couple of weeks, before renting the house across the street from her parents. Her parents were supportive, but they also cared for her handicapped brother, so moving home with two small children was not an option.

At the time they separated, Kelly and her husband owned a house. He also moved out of the home, but the mortgage still had to be paid until the house could be sold.

“The kids were in day care, and I had to pay a mortgage and rent on another place,” she said. “Day care was $125 a week. I eventually got child support: $35 a week.”

Fortunately, the house sold fairly quickly. Kelly used her share of the money to purchase the house she’d been renting.

Kelly also had to employ a baby sitter on the nights she went to school. A former neighbor was a godsend, she said.

“It takes a village. If it wasn’t for Colleen, it would have taken longer to finish, if I even would have graduated,” said Kelly. “The kids enjoyed her and she provided consistency. It wasn’t a hardship for them.”

Kelly had transferred from Holy Family to The Wharton School at the University of Pennsylvania, which is known as one of the best business schools in the United States. But because of the transfer, she lost some of the credits she had earned at Holy Family.

“It set me back credit-wise, and made it take a little longer for me to finish.”

In the meantime, Kelly kept plugging away.

“I worked my way into jobs, but I didn’t have the pedigree.”

What she did make sure she had early on, however, was a two-year degree.

“The other thing I did very deliberately,” Kelly said. “I got an associate’s in case I couldn’t finish (college) and had to look for another job.”

While she was taking classes, Kelly received tuition assistance from the bank where she worked. If she earned an A or a B in her classes, the bank would reimburse her 80 percent of the cost of the class. Since tuition had to be paid up front, she kept a line of credit against her house and paid it town each time she was reimbursed.

“I stopped going to school for a semester or two when the kids were newborns,” Kelly said, “but otherwise, I went year-round. I would take two classes in the fall and two in the spring, and go two nights a week.”

To keep up with her course work, her position at the bank and raising her family, Kelly said she would give herself little perks — like sleeping in a bit on Saturday mornings.

“I kept cereal on a low shelf, and on Saturday mornings, they would watch cartoons.”

She also permitted them one activity to participate in. Her daughter danced, and her son played soccer.

When she had vacation time in the pre-internet days, she would go to the library and do her research. When her children would go visit their father, she would take advantage of the alone time and spend the entire weekend working on her papers.

“I couldn’t procrastinate,” she said.

When Kelly’s children were little, but old enough to play independently, she would take them to the playground and lug along her books so she could read and study. She would also read on the train, to and from work. And during her son’s soccer tournaments, she would bring her textbooks, and then go off away from the other parents and read.

There was no time to go to the movies, watch television or read for pleasure.

“I have no social references for the entire ’80s,” she said, laughing. “If I had time off and didn’t have something to do, I would go to bed at 8:30. Now that was exciting.”

Kelly graduated in 1991 with a bachelor’s degree in management marketing.

A few years later, when her children were in high school, she went back to school to earn a master’s in information management.

“It took a little more than three years,” she said. “I went through Penn State’s accelerated program. Every seven weeks was a new course.”

It wasn’t all work, work, work, though.

“For two weeks in August, when I didn’t have school and the kids didn’t have school, we would come to the Poconos,” said Kelly. “It was so nice to read for enjoyment with no real consequences. Reading for fun. I still love to do it.”

After 17 years of working at the bank, it was bought out by another bank, and after a short time, all of the operations were transferred to Pittsburgh, and Kelly was let go.

“When they shut down the bank, I got severance. I took advantage of it and went to school for one semester full time. It was such a delight,” Kelly said.

“I started at the bank at 17 and was laid off 17 years later. I worked there half my life. It was the middle of the recession. At least I had a fresh degree and 17 years experience.”

Despite her education and experience, it took Kelly nearly 10 months to find another job. The only places hiring were retail, which would require her to work nights and weekends. After years of giving up those nights and weekends to go to school and study, she wasn’t willing to do it anymore.

“I applied to other banks, but the atmosphere was still not parent-friendly. Every week I would get the paper on Sunday, and Monday and Tuesday I would send out resumes.”

While she was looking for work, she worked two temporary jobs, but there were no benefits, which were important, especially for a single mother.

Ten months after earning her master’s degree, Kelly was hired by the Vanguard Group, an investment management company in Malvern. She worked as a security analyst, focused on managing the security of people who worked at the company.

In April 2016, she retired.

“I had wanted to be a stay-at-home wife and mother. But I ended up being the primary wage earner,” said Kelly, reflecting on the way her life changed course.

Having made a decision in her late teens to get an education, and sticking with it no matter how difficult it could be at times, turned out to be the right decision.

“It was a good thing because I got to control my destiny.”