Life with Liz: When nothing goes right
Have you ever had a stretch of time where it just seems like nothing goes right?
I’ve been having one of those stretches for a few weeks now. It started about two months ago.
A job that I was interested in pursuing came along, but with E having a few more years of elementary school ahead of her, it just didn’t seem like the right time for a career shift. However, I was afraid if I didn’t at least show interest in it, I might not get the opportunity again.
The Wonderful Husband and I had many long talks about how our lives would change if I got the job, and we agreed that while this wasn’t an ideal time for such a change, it would be better to go for it and adjust as needed than let the opportunity pass. At that point, even though I still hadn’t applied for the job, we looped the kids in the conversation. It was a difficult conversation to have, because I still wasn’t even set on applying for the job, and I didn’t want to stress them out or get their hopes up.
I was surprised at how enthusiastic they were. Ultimately, though, things didn’t work out and I ended up not getting the job, and while we could all agree that it was better things worked out like this for now, it was still a little disappointing. I set it to the side, though, and moved on with life.
Until E brought home her “All About Me” sheet from her first week at school. Under what she wanted to be when she grew up was listed both a writer and the job that I didn’t get. Of course, she’d forgotten she ever wanted to be that and had gone back to wanting to be a princess, scientist, gymnast, unicorn rider, but I was reminded of how much of a role model I am to her, and I felt like a complete failure.
Failure No. 2 was slightly more comical. About two years ago I said I needed to go car shopping. Well, as one of the world’s most successful procrastinators, I managed to put it off until about two weeks ago, when I realized that my inspection was going to expire in days and the old girl didn’t have a prayer of passing it. I had a vague idea of what I wanted, but I wasn’t finding anything in my price range.
My friend P swears by buying low-mileage used vehicles from a reputable car rental company.
“Come on, Liz, you have kids. You know any vehicle you get is going to look like a bomb went off in it minutes after you drive it off the lot,” she reminded me. “It just doesn’t pay to spend the money on a brand-new vehicle.”
She had a point. Sure enough, the exact vehicle that I wanted, even in the right color, was available and in my price range. Jackpot!
Except the vehicle was in another state. So, it took a few days to get it to the local dealer. Then, they had to wait for the title transfer. Then, we had to do all the paperwork.
Unfortunately, we couldn’t proceed, because it slipped my mind that my driver’s license had expired. So, I had to get that renewed quickly. Then, we had to have a time when both the WH and I could come in to do the test drive and more paperwork. As the days ticked down to Aug. 31, I was starting to panic.
The stars finally aligned, and with two days to spare, we drove my shiny “new” vehicle home. The WH was following me and the minute we parked, he said, “That thing has to go back tomorrow.”
Here, a brake light was burned out. No big deal, I thought. So, the next day, after making arrangements to have the car returned and fixed, I thought I’d better try out some of the other bells and whistles. I flipped the knob to try out the four-wheel drive, and the knob actually fell off in my hand. Of course, every light on the dashboard lit up in error! I tried to calmly pull over to the side of the road, having no idea what gear I was in, or what kind of damage I might have done.
The WH was back on the phone with the dealer in minutes. After talking through some checklists, they assured me that the car was safe to drive and added the knob to the list of things to fix. The next day, as I got ready to take the car back, I had to flip on the windshield wipers. Of course, one of them flew off immediately. At that point, I gave up. The car has been back at the dealer for almost a week, and thankfully, they did provide us with a rental, but the frustration of it all has me feeling like “seriously, most adults can usually handle buying a car, can’t they?”
The kids’ elementary school has been one of the buildings affected by the mold situation, and having them shuttling off to different schools on a different schedule felt like a terrible way to start the year. Of course, that situation was beyond my control, but as we missed buses and forgot what “day” it was, it just felt like one more thing that I couldn’t get right. Added to the ongoing home renovations that keep getting pushed back because a leaky toilet needed to be fixed, or the furnace needed repair, and it just feels like I’m powerless to change anything or even get anything accomplished.
I keep reminding myself that these situations are all only temporary, and in fact, may of them even have a silver lining. The WH got the car dealer to throw in some additional floor mats, and the entire vehicle is getting a fresh detail after they fix the minor issues. G got shuttled to the middle school for a few weeks, and now I know that next year he will not have as many jitters when he heads there full time. It’s also a reminder that although I can’t control a lot of these situations, I can control how I react to them. Having a supportive village also helps. Knowing that the same friends who are dropping everything to help run my kids around are also betting on what part of the car is going to fall off next, not only helps my sanity, it keeps me laughing, too!
Liz Pinkey is a contributing writer to the Times News. Her column appears weekly in our Saturday feature section.
